Confessions With Bre 1.4 Sometimes I Wonder

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This is the 1st confessional with Bre Nicole J of the 2016 year! And well, sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be in a relationship ? It’s not something I think about often,but every now and then I just wonder . My last relationship was 6 years ago. And now that person is engaged and has a child. I’m starting to think I have 7 years of bad luck from those memes I came across in the past.

I wonder if I would be a good girlfriend. I wonder if I would be my significant other’s best friend. As the people around me get older and begin to create families and become engaged, I wonder when my prince charming will come swinging my way.

I wonder what he looks like? What he smells like? His smile, his character and even how he is with people? Does he love God? Is he a hard worker? What is he like? As I’m approaching 24 in  a few days and a year away from my 25th birthday I wonder where he is?

Trust me ,being in a relationship is not my main focus and I don’t even go out to look for him. I’m heavily invested in my gifts from blogging, to becoming an entrepreneur, and making my debut in being an on air personality.But still I just wait for the day for my man to come swinging my way.

Is it a sin to have these thoughts? To want someone other than God, my parents, family, and friends to love me? These are the questions I ask myself.

I’ve invested so much of who I am into friendships that didn’t last or with men who have put me in the friend zone. Yes women get put in the friend zone too.

As a woman, I have to admit sometimes that can definitely weigh on your self esteem and be a hard pill to swallow. A woman wants to feel wanted by the man she loves. But sometimes the person you love, does not always feel the same way about you. Don’t feel bitter though! Many times these are blessings in disguise.

Luke 6:38 says “Give, and it will be given to you. A good portion—packed down, firmly shaken, and overflowing—will fall into your lap. The portion you give will determine the portion you receive in return”

Over the past few years, I have sown so many seeds. Some good seeds and some bad. But I know one day the good portion that I have sown, into myself, into others, and to the people of God will return back with more than I have received in the past.

I thank God for all the many lessons He has shown me. But every now and then I wonder when will my good portion be given.

 

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